So I’m sure many of you have heard the saying “live life with no regrets”. For a while, I (like many people) was convinced that I’d be successful in living my life this way, and I thought I was – until May 18, 2010. This was the day that my Nana passed away after fighting a life long battle with the immune system deficiency disease Lupus. Her death was very difficult for my family and I, but to make things worse, I realized that I would live the rest of my life with one single regret. From that day forward, I would regret not spending enough quality time with my Nana.

I often catch myself thinking of my grandmother and wondering why I never took enough time to spend with her. It’s weird, because I know I loved her and cared very much about her well-being, I just never truly understood that tomorrow really isn’t promised for anybody. While she was still here I never took time to think about how my life would be without her. It was always about making a sacrifice – do I go out shopping with my friends, or do I go spend time watching (what I thought were boring) TV shows with my elderly and sick Nana? At the time I usually chose selfishly to go to the mall. I would only give up shopping to spend time with my Nana on a Saturday night on rare occasions. Looking back, however, I wish I spent more time with her.

Although May 18, 2010 was a very sad day for me in many respects, it was also a time that reality hit me hard and I came to a sense of realization. After losing my Nana, I finally understand the importance of family and making them come first. It’s extremely important to understand that spending time with your loved ones should always be a priority, because you never know when you’ll see someone for the last time. It’s not fair, but it’s the truth. I regret not spending time with my Nana and it’s my fault. I take responsibility for the selfish decisions that I made, but instead of making it something that I dwell on, I made it a learning experience. It’s unfortunate that it took the death of one of the closest people in my life to understand this, but I hope that my experience helps others understand that family should always come first.

-Kerrin