I just read an article in The New York Times called Young, in Love and Sharing Everything, Including a Password. The author wrote about how many people – both couples and friends – share their password to prove their love and/or trust for one another. He also wrote about how although people see password sharing as a symbol of love or trust, you shouldn’t share your passwords because it can be dangerous. You never know if the person you trusted will turn against you.

I used to be one of these people who desperately wanted to have my boyfriend’s passwords as a sign of trust. Like one of the girls mentioned in the article, I thought that if my boyfriend had nothing to hide he wouldn’t have a reason to keep it from me. However, he never shared it, and now I don’t want it. Sharing passwords is really not a symbol of trust. If you think about it, it’s a symbol of distrust, because if you really trusted someone, you wouldn’t feel the need to look through their accounts and read their private messages.

The author also mentioned that sometimes sharing passwords is the reason relationships fail. I think that has a lot of truth. Once you start looking through your significant other’s messages, you might start making something out of nothing. For instance, you may start interpreting things the wrong way. He/she may be talking to a really good friend and you may automatically assume that there’s something going on between them when there really isn’t. So then the trust starts to go away (for no reason) and soon you guys break up. It may not always happen this way, but there’s definitely a strong possibility.

Plus, whether or not you’re in a romantic or friendly relationship, everyone is entitled to their privacy. No one should have to disclose their entire life to anyone else. Like I said, if someone really trusts you they shouldn’t feel the need to invade your privacy. Besides, if you give out your password for one reason or another; your partner could use your accounts to their advantage by blackmailing you or sharing your password with others. Even if you feel like your partner right now is the most trustworthy person in the world and that he or she would never hurt you… things happens… people change.  I’m sure you’d rather be safe than sorry. Trusting someone is not about sharing passwords, it’s about believing in their word without having to go through their things to confirm it.

-Erica