The beginning of a new school year often comes with a lot of stress. And sometimes this stress can affect your relationships making normally untroubling disagreements really upsetting. If you and a friend seem to be getting into arguments because of the added stress of school, you might be interested in my suggestions on how to “resolve and reconnect.”

• Keep calm, no one benefits from yelling or shouting
• Give your friend a chance to speak and make their points
• Listen and try to understand what your friend has to say
• Be clear. Talking in circles makes it hard to get your point across
• REMEMBER: Not every argument can be “won.” The goal of any conflict shouldn’t be to convert the other person to your way of thinking but to find a middle ground where everyone involved feels heard.

These tips can be hard to follow in the heat of the moment, but if you’re able to practice them most of the time, then you’re on the right track. But sometimes arguments can go wrong with the people you care about and a disagreement can become worse even after you talk it out. Be patient. If the good times with your friend outweighs the bad, then you will likely be able to to get past your disagreement with time. Remain friendly and acknowledge your friend at school and make an effort to do the things you normally do with your mutual friends. It’s only a matter of time until your relationship will be back to the way it was, and strengthened by overcoming differences together.

-Owen